Monday, February 2, 2009

Is it time?

Is it time to let the shock of my car dissipate? I don't know if I can? The horror and trauma of it are etched in my memory like a freakin carving in a tree. It is never going to leave my head. I wish I had the strength to let it go. But really it has created so many issues in the days since it's occurance! I keep replaying the damn thing standing in the middle of the road, it's eyes, I can recall immediately thinking "holy shit, this thing is huge, it's a bull", I can feel the movement of trying to swerve and then seeing his creamy underbelly in the window thinking he is going to come thru the window. For something that happened so fast, there was alot into it.Then Chelsea was screaming and Mike opened up my door and said those f^%&^$%$$ words. "I don't think we are up to date with our insurance". Where is the "we" in that? I am adamant about paying certain bills, that being one of them. I would never as so much drive to the mailbox with out it. Being I asked a couple of weeks before and received the A. of "yes, we are all paid up". I see no "we" in this error. As I write this I see, no I- it is not time. I am not ready to let it go. I so need counseling! :(

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